Insights From A Teenager: AR
Posted by Anna Debenham, June 16, 2018
As you know The Insight Alliance focuses mainly on the prison population, but occasionally we venture off piste. I had the wonderful opportunity to have a few sessions with a teenage girl, Aliza, who was really struggling in school and inside her self. She was told by her councillor she had ‘biological depression’ and the only thing that would help would be lexapro, an anti-depressant. I saw it quite differently, and Aliza was up for spending some time together.
Her insights into her own mental wellbeing has been pretty remarkable. She’s blown me away quite frankly. She created this Slam Poem, below, that describes some of her experience. She even performed it at the end of semester event at her school in front of her whole year. It speaks for itself and she rocked the socks off it. And it was all her. She performed it for me today, first time I heard it. She’s incredible. I was so moved I asked her if I could share it here with you all and she was totally up for it.
You don’t need to be physically in prison to feel imprisoned in your own mind. And whether you’re locked up or not we all have the capacity to see who we really are. As Aliza says, we’re only one thought away.
One Thought Away, By Aliza Rose
Drowning
Unable to stop the flood of tears
Feeling worthless
Why are others happy and I’m sad?
Why do I have to feel this way?
Will I ever be able to swim to the surface?
Helpless
Outlook on life is foggy
Empty inside
School feeling toxic as ever
Isolated
–
Unhappy
Sad
Clinically and chemically depressed
Insecure
Too sensitive
Those were the labels that professionals gave me and I did feel that way
Hope
My parents never gave up on me
They knew I could change the channel
That is my mind
I barely had an ounce of hope
But one day, something changed
It took the help of my mom’s friend, Anna
To guide me in the right direction
The things she said resonated with me
And something clicked in place in my mind
Reassured
She told me that
My thoughts are just neutral energy
That I latch onto
Then I use my internal special effects team to bedazzle them
And spin them out of control
I don’t have to let my thoughts control me
I don’t have to spin on my thoughts
I don’t have to let others affect the way I see the world
I can swim to the surface
I can defog my vision
I can be happy
And
I can have peace of mind
Clarity
I can now see clearly
A ‘me’ that was controlled by sadness and my thoughts
Unable to accept my imperfections
Took things personally
Cried everyday
Talked shit about others since I didn’t feel good about myself
And
I didn’t want to be alive
The me not controlled by sadness and my thoughts
Accepts my imperfections
Doesn’t take things personally
Laughs everyday
Builds myself and my friends up
And wants to be alive and loves life
No matter how low I feel
I know I am ok
I know the sun is always shining
I just need to get through the storm clouds
The difference between a bad and a good day is our state of mind
We all have an innate wellbeing
Whether we believe it or not
We are one thought away
From sadness, anger
And happiness
We are one thought away